Friday, January 31, 2020

Why does the word “deciding” look like it’s spelt wrong when you stare at it for awhile

It’s pretty powerful that on any given day you have the power to change the direction you want your life to go. It’s just deciding who you’re gonna be, what’s it gonna look like, how you’re gonna do it. Just deciding. One day last year on a whim, Chey decided to apply for a teaching job here in Pullman. She applied so late the job posting had closed two months before she sent in her application. We didn’t know that. As fate would have it she would end up getting an interview anyway. We had one day to decide if she would take the interview. We decided we would drive 10 hours round trip in a day and a half to go give that dream a shot. Turns out that the Pullman teachers and administrators she talked with decided she would be a perfect fit here. She was given a call back. I think she had a week to decide if she was going to take it. I also think we had decided she would take the job before we even left Pullman on her interview trip. So many decisions led us back to Pullman but what did Pullman really offer that we couldn’t find it Tacoma?

I love the mountains. I love the Puget Sound. I love the rain. I don’t love the traffic. But to me the southern Puget Sound was a place I never saw myself leaving. Both our families are in the area. Pullman was always a pipe dream and a fun thing to day dream about whenever Rachel would beg us to move east. Maybe it was that long 5 hour drive back west, when Chey finished her interview and we chatted about the upsides of moving to Pullman. I think in our hearts we were both trying to convince each other it was a good idea, even though we weren’t sure ourselves. For one, Pullman is nostalgic. Would living there capture that same magic that all Cougs experience when they go to school here? That intangible, but very real, electricity that exists on campus. Was it the messy brushstrokes of orange, red and purple that are cast across the evening sky in the summer and fall months? The warm summer breeze? Was the allure of Pullman that freeze which causes your nose to become a cavern of a dozen boogie-crystals on deep breaths? I’m not really sure what it is. But it very different from the Tacoma area. My guess is as good as yours, but that might’ve been the biggest draw. We decided we wanted something different.

It is different here. I’m not sure how yet but there is something about the people. It’s a small town, but it reels people in from all over the world. It’s a carousel of sorts. People only stay for a few years and maybe they come back like we did. Even professionals in this town seem to come and go like seasons (thx fergie). I knew this before we moved here. It’s safe here too. I never lock my car. People walk places. In Tacoma I never once walked anywhere. You don’t do that in Tacoma unless you’re right downtown and even then most the time you need to get into your car and drive to go anywhere. I knew moving here I could change the way I lived. I could become more localized. But my habits from living in Tacoma have followed me here. I still drive places even though I could walk. I will drive a mile. I’m not experiencing Pullman in the way it can be experienced. I think I am selling myself short of what Pullman is and has to offer.

In college I had no car and had to rely on rides from others, primarily Dalton (https://daltonandtammy.blogspot.com/?m=1 oh yeah go there and subscribe to email updates). But I also rode my bike around for 2 years and had no problems. I rode in the winter and I rode in the summer. My work commute is ridiculously short now. I had to commute further in college to work than I do right now. Why am I not doing that now? I’ve gotten lazy and I need to shake it up a bit, and experience Pullman. So, I’ve listed my car on Craigslist and plan to bike anywhere I need to go. Damn Thoreau must’ve gotten to me since the last post. Chey will still keep her Subaru for our errands and trips, and I plan to get a car again sooner than later. But I need to open my mind up to what Pullman is offering. I sound like a granoly.

Also Dalton and I have talked ourselves out of the Ironman race. I think we enjoyed the sound of becoming Ironmen. What that means. I think I liked the idea of completing the race for the status and what it meant more than actually having a desire to do it. I mean I enjoy doing races and training for hard physical goals and what not. But I like to run because it makes me healthy and stronger for things I enjoy doing like hiking. An Ironman is just so much training for something that is just a one liner- “I did an Ironman.” I dont think the reward would be worth the amount of time it would take to train for it. It’s not a lifetime dream of mine to do the race. I just thought it would be a good challenge. I’d rather spend the time training for that by instead working on my mind, or spending the time with Cheyenne, or hiking mountains. That being said we are still running a marathon in June. I guess I just didn’t want to waste my entire year in 2020 hanging out in the gym and committing to something I didn’t care enough about just to say “I did it.” So again, on any given day, you can plant your foot and turn around. You can change your course.

SEL is moving me to day shift in March. I look forward to it so much. I will be aligned with Cheyenne’s schedule and we can even carpool if need be. Another cool part of Pullman I wanted to experience is all the cool events at WSU that happen in the evenings. I haven’t been able to go to them since I work the swing shift. Working 8-4 sounds like the dream. I’m just going to be happy to see Cheyenne during the days instead of solely on the weekends. I think I got a little lucky to be changed cuz only last week did I ask to be transferred but this week they actually created a new shift time that covers both day shifts and swing shifts at SEL. It was a smart decision to ask about it when I did.

Things are tickin upwards.

Stay livin’

Monday, January 27, 2020

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation”

Reading a lot of books recently. The lord of transcendentalism, Thoreau, is quite interesting to read. the book, Walden, is nearly 200 years old but he hits on topics that I think about daily. He talks about how man can waste his life working and to what end? I cant help but think of my buddy Dalton and his aspirations to live super simply in his van. So bold, but I think if I was honest with myself about what I want in my life it'd be something along those lines. I do not like being tied down to one spot. Also I think breaking up life into something so simple might slow it down a bit. At least living like that interrupts the routine for a minute.

I think about what do I want my life to look like with Cheyenne as we go forward. On Saturday, purely out of boredom we drove around looking at houses that are the market. One thing led to another and we met with a Remax agent and are planning to go to the bank to go see what kind of loan we can get from the bank. Are these actions not now a juxtaposition from my prior thoughts? Absolutely. Its pretty easy to want more and more and to have it all and do everything. Thats why I think its harder to do without more. To live simpler is a lot harder. We just keep collecting and acquiring new things. I dont want to be like that. Whenever I clean out the closet, or the dresser, or get rid of all the loose mail, it feels so much better. Why not clean out your whole house like that. Do we really need that extra desk? Do we need that table when all we do it put mail on it? Lets see if I can make little strides this week to change my way of thinking on this stuff. 

I mean reading a book on it is one thing but to live it is another. I read a lot of cool stories and watch amazing films on stuff I would like to do. But thats all I am doing these days it seems. I am finding the more often I experience things second-hand the less often I go out to experience it first hand. Its not enough to see places on TV, I need to go there. I dont want to lead a life of quiet desperation as the title of this post would suggest.

Another thing that makes all this hit home just a bit deeper is the fact that Kobe died. I didnt even think I was that big of a Kobe fan, but that really shocked me. Someone omnipotent like that gone so randomly. Like it just drives in the point that you have to live hard. No one can call when its your time. It can all end so randomly, and who knows what follows life, but I want to enjoy every bit of it and not feel at any point like I wasted too much of it. Of course I dont live everyday to the fullest, but shocking accidents like that do make you stop and take a deeper breath, and soak in everything just a little bit more than normal. 

Chey and I went to the WSU Planetarium which was really interesting. Watched a little documentary on dark matter and honestly most of it went over my head (literally & figuratively) but it was really trippy and honestly amazing to watch. Id pay to just lay on my back with some relaxing music and just stare up at it traveling through the stars, that'd be quite the experience. 

The weather is unnaturally warm for Pullman this time of year. Its supposed to get up into the 50's this week and the snow nearly all melted away. Is this all a facade? Likely. Next weekend will probably be 15°F and we will be freezing again. 

Always Stay Livin'


x

Sunday, January 19, 2020

Reading books and surviving the winter

Winter is brutal now. A haiku for you. 

Lord. Pullman is cold. 
Three seasons here are lovely. 
But now the light dies


It’s properly cold now. I couldn’t get up my driveway the other day and had to shovel the compact ice and throw salt down just so I could park. I was spinning all 4 tires trying to make it up the little hill. 
 I feel like I spent the week daydreaming about future plans and being somewhere else in the world. I realize I should probably appreciate where I am now. I mean I know almost every Coug would want a chance to come back to Pullman and enjoy its little things that make it so special. I know I gloss over them in my day to day routine. I spent the week day dreaming about van life with Dalton. Or talking to Rachel about Japan. Watching Hannah’s running app mileage rise. Wishing I was back in class like Sarah is. I know it’s all about perspective and in reality the world is really open to me. I can open myself to opportunity, I can create. I planned a climbing trip to Mt Adams and am gonna try to have a big crew of people in late spring go up and try and throw a party at 9k feet. See below.

 Another thing about Pullman is that it is small, but simultaneously it’s the epicenter of everything. I was wondering all week about me being somewhere else and all I had to do was look a mile up the road to see something special happening in my own backyard.

Chey cooked me dinner on Friday night when I got off work. We ate it and watched some movies. Shoot. I know plenty of people want to have a relationship like ours and I take it for granted.  And here I was wishing I was somewhere else, off to the edge of the world, and not realizing Chey is also one of the best adventures I could ever find. 


The weekend closes with a very familiar soundtrack. One that echos the blog posts of the Cougar Kid back in 2014. I draw up my post and sit on my bed. In the living room Cheyenne and Bose are laughing so hard the only sound I can hear are my own key strokes. 

Monday, January 13, 2020

a life in the desert

Man, getting in a groove is wild. I am caught in a routine now here in Pullman and I feel like life is on auto pilot. Days are predictable and the same. I can close my eyes and let my brain recline and I just go through my motions again and again. Time is pouring through my hands like sand. I mean I have not posted once on this blog in two months. I tell myself from time to time that I will get into the habit but it has not happened. I wanted this blog to almost be a journal, but it seems to just be a highlight reel. I have been reading a bunch lately which provides me with an activity that satisfies me. I just feel I have not been living very purposefully as of late. An interesting conundrum, considering I have a bunch of things I am working towards such as training for an Ironman race in June. Maybe I really need to just slow down and appreciate all the little wonders around me instead of trying to do as much as I can possibly do all the time. I guess I can qualify this bit as my journally bit, do a quick highlight reel of life since the last post and then (hopefully) write back sooner as to avoid the highlight montage...

lets see, since Nov 10th:


Cleaning Rachel's roof

thanksgiving in roslyn 2019

gym time all the time

Half Marathon December 2019

xmas tree hunting in Harvard, ID

potential vanagon in our future?

petroglyphs along the snake around 4500 years old (the art, not the guy)

north end of the blue mountains in SE Washington and NE Oregon

chey and buoy on xmas eve 2019

2020 Party in Roslyn New Years Eve

mug shot

a snowy keke picture

The palouse is cold and windy now. what perfect weather it is to keep on bloggin